Ryan Budges A Door

One of the tasks of an infantryman in an urban setting is to knock down doors to gain entry into buildings. It's one of the tasks that Ryan Conklin really enjoys doing. He has said that it helps him to overcome frustration.

There are several possible methods to free the door from what is holding it in place. One method is direct forward force to dislodge the door. It can be accomplished through using a heavy object to ram against the door, or using the same principle but using a part of person's body to apply the force. In the latter case, this would be done through kicking the door with the foot or striking it with the shoulder as one runs into it. The expectation is the force will break the weaker of the door itself around the lock mechanism or the door frame holding the strike plate and latch.

Recently, Ryan had the opportunity to engage in some good old-fashioned door breaking. Like most straight men when there is too much testosterone around and not enough common sense, Ryan chose to use the shoulder to the door approach to try to knock it loose.

Ryan stood back from the door and eying it had at least the foresight to realize and to acknowledge to the men around him, "This is going to hurt." The guys standing there, one with camera to capture the operation, were amused by what was about to transpire and so let Ryan have a go at it: "Do your thing, Sunshine!"

Ryan prepared himself for his attack run against the door by first removing his sporty sunglasses from his shoulder pocket and handing them to a fellow soldier. No need to make them a casualty if something should go awry. Then speaking to the camera ala The Office, Ryan explained he would "try to enter."

Ryan did a short three step jaunt towards the door and slammed into it. It shook a little and it made Ryan yelp from the impact. The other men laughed, but with determination, Ryan did another three step hop and bounced against the heavy door again. Before anyone could stop the futility, Ryan exclaimed, "I can get it!" He headed back to the door and applied all the force he could muster. He gave a yell worthy of any tennis pro serving at Wimbledon, but unfortunately, the door held its ground.

Someone told Ryan, "There's something behind it." Ryan agreed with the assessment, saying, "There's something behind it." So of course Ryan then proceeded twice more to bang his body full force against the door for no useful purpose. The door at least wavered a little bit within its frame.

Ryan insisted he had started the door's destruction, but agreed to step aside to let a bigger guy see what he could do. That guy tried it twice to no avail, so "The Ram" (literally a battering ram) was called in to do the job. There was mention of using "The Hammer", but it was noted that it had been broken. No one pointed their finger at Ryan when they mentioned the fate of the hammer.

The video of the escapade doesn't show if the door was ever defeated or not. Instead it ends with Ryan shown with his feet on a desk, repeating a line from Borat. It didn't seem to have any connection with what had come before, but it at least allowed for a happy ending. Hopefully Ryan will have more success in the inevitable sequel.