Once when Ryan Conklin was with Chet Cannon, he was inspired to list off his choices for the four "biggest mistakes" of the last several years:1) Sanjaya Malakar, contestant on American Idol.
2) Carrot Top, prop comedian.
3) Elian Gonzalez, Cuban refugee.
4) Jar Jar Binks, a clownish animated character in Episodes 1-3 of the Star Wars movie saga.
The Mystery of Sanjaya had amazed the country only the year before, so it was understandable that the mistake of his selection was still fresh in Ryan's mind.
The mistake of putting Jar Jar, a minstrel show character in Gungan face, into one of the most anticipated sequels in movie history, was a decision universally decried. It was one of several factors that effectively killed the continuation of the magic from the initial Star Wars trilogy. Ryan was troubled by the character's effect on an a shared cultural icon, and on art and culture in general.
The inclusion of Carrot Top was a concession to Chet, who was insistent that the comedian "has always been a mistake." While it is true that Carrot Top is not particularly amusing for a comedian, the mistake would be the frightening cosmetic procedures that it appears he has had done. Shocking.
Chet wasn't so sure of Ryan's selection of Elian. He asked Ryan, "How is Elian Gonzalez a big mistake?" Ryan didn't want to get into a political discussion, so he replied, "He just is."
[Ryan no doubtably was disturbed the U.S. government's shameful involvement in literally ripping little Elian away from his Miami family and sending him back to the island prison state of Cuba. He was given like a repossessed car back to his biological father, who was a collaborator with the communist regime and a supporter of the brutal dictator Fidel Castro.]
Chet then proceeded to contest the selection on a technicality. He told Ryan that the Elian affair wasn't in the last four years, but Ryan not wishing to dispute it, remarked that, whatever, it was still fresh in his mind. Chet suggested that maybe it was even more than ten years before (it was nine) and then Ryan vacillated on his opinion on whether it was or not. To switch gears a little, Ryan wondered aloud what JD was doing now.
That opened the door for Chet to conjecture that Elian was now training dolphins with JD Ordonez, or perhaps was really JD himself. Ryan laughed about the Elian/JD connection, thinking about his own comparison between Eddie Murphy and Devyn Simone. He wondered what connections could be made for the other housemates between them and celebrities. The most accurate? Chet Cannon as the reincarnation of Orville Redenbacher.
